Dear Future Me On A Level Results Day 2018

8.14.2018

Bonjour! Yet again, it has been a little while. I apologise for not updating my little corner of the internet for quite some time so I'm hoping I'll be forgiven. Truthfully, I haven't been in the writing mood and I've felt a little lost for ideas and things to talk about. I've chosen to blame it on the glorious Summer we've had because anyone who knows me will know that I practically hibernate during the warmer months. Autumn and Winter are the seasons when I feel the most like myself and so I just haven't been in the blogging mood. However, I'm back and hopefully this time I won't be abandoning you any time soon.



As you can see from the title, this post will be a little different from anything I've written before. I've seen a couple of videos on YouTube (because yes I am currently freaking out big time about results day and have been binge watching past results day videos) from people who have a positive outlook on the day. I thought I could try being a little optimistic and reassuring by writing a few things down that I and other students need to remember on results day. So, here we go.


Dear future me on results day 2018, 

It's difficult to know where to begin because the last few months have been such a roller coaster. Challenging, strenuous, draining, frustrating, rewarding. The 3 years that you have been doing A Levels have been the most important years in your life so far. Not only because they have created stepping stones for your future but because they have been the years that you have naturally grown as a person. You've become more confident in the person you are, you've taken risks, been incredibly brave and you've come out the other end stronger than I ever could have hoped for you. Regardless of how horrific your mental health was at times, you always pushed through. You were patient with yourself when everything became difficult and frustrating. You were resilient, focused and I know that you could not have worked any harder than you did. 


The last 3 years have literally flown by and yet so much has happened during that time. It seems ridiculous and diminishing that 3 years of work comes down to a single piece of paper with a few letters on it this Thursday. I can't count the number of sleepless nights you've had during that time, how many times you doubted yourself or cried for hours the night before an important deadline. But guess what? You did it. Results day for you isn't about whether you got the grades to get into University because thankfully you were accepted into your first choice back in January which I'm still so proud of you for. I know that doesn't make it any easier because results day for you has always been about all of your hard work paying off. And I get it. It's so unbelievably disheartening to have overworked yourself for months for your efforts to not be reflected in the outcome. And I think that's why today means so much to you. It's why you've had so many sleepless nights and nightmares about it throughout the summer. And that's okay. It's okay because it shows how much you care. Deep down I know you're a huge believer that grades don't define you and they shouldn't restrict you from achieving your goals. Having said that, I think it's important to remind you that you also believe that everything happens for a reason. Yes you worked so fucking hard. Yes it's unfair that your grades are ultimately determined by a two hour paper at the end of the course that don't always reflect what you're actually capable of achieving because of pressure and time restrictions etc. But these are the grades that you are going to get. And if it means that plans change and you're forced to consider Plan B, then maybe Plan A wasn't the right path for you anyway. You'll eventually end up exactly where you're meant to be. Taking a different route or changing your mind doesn't mean you've failed. You of all people should have accepted that by now. 


If you don't get the results you're hoping for, please know that you did everything you could. I know exam season feels like a blur right now but you couldn't have worked any harder. Your grades don't reflect what kind of person you are. You're still resilient, empathetic, focused, kind and determined. You're still going to the University of Brighton to study English Language and Linguistics. You can still look at doing a Masters in Speech and Language Pathology. You're still going to live in Brighton for the next 3 years. You're still going to meet some incredible new people. You're still going to be surrounded by your friends and family. And yes you'll still make a million mistakes and wrong decisions along the way but honey you'll still flourish. You'll still grow and you'll look back one day and accept that everything happens for a reason even if you're not entirely sure what that reason is at the specific time that it happens. Just be patient. Trust that life is taking you on the path you're meant to be on and live your best life because grades are not going to influence what truly matters. If you don't get what you're hoping for, be sad. You're allowed to cry and be disappointed. But then look at the bigger picture and remember exactly what your past self has just told you. Your life is worth so much more than what is written on a piece of paper so if you take anything from this post then let it be that. 


Best of luck to everyone receiving results this summer. Whether you're in year 13 waiting for your A Level results or you're expecting your GCSE results next week - I'm rooting for you and I know that you should be proud of yourself no matter what. 

Lots of Love,
Meg X

Brighton & London Trip | Photo Diary

If you've been following my blog for a while (ur support is much appreciated xoxo) then you'll know how much I adore visiting London. Last month, my sister and I decided to take a little trip to Brighton and ended up visiting London while we were there. Since I'm moving to Brighton for Uni next month, I really wanted to take my sister there to explore since she's never been and we just had the best few days away (apart from the humidity, yuck.) And so I thought I'd share some of my favourite photos from the trip in a photo diary as opposed to me rambling on and on which nobody really wants (lets be honest). So, I hope you enjoy and I'll see you again very soon!



Lots of Love,
Meg X

Finding My Feet

7.05.2018

Hello my beautiful readers. It's been a short while, hasn't it? It feels like a lifetime has passed since I last sat in front of my laptop with my blog on the screen and a bunch of things I want to write about. That's all because over the last few months I've actually been studying for and then doing my final A Level exams in college. In all honesty, I actually wrote a very long and rambly blog post about my A Level / exam experience because despite sounding dramatic it has been utterly horrific. The last few months in particular have been the worst I've felt in a long time, if not the worst and lowest I have ever been. However, I didn't really want to publish something so personal and put a downer on things even though I've always been honest on my blog. Instead I've decided to save it in my drafts for a time in the future where I'm in the right mindset to reflect on my A Level experience and ultimately how it made me a stronger person. 


Enough about that because this post, if you can't already tell from the title, will be focusing on the light at the end of the darkness. It's kind of linked to how I've been feeling over the last few months but I wanted to write about how even in our darkest moments, it's important to remember that they won't last forever. 

It's so easy to tell somebody who is struggling that it won't last forever and that there are brighter days ahead. Feeling genuinely happy can seem so out of reach for days, weeks or months on end and being stuck in a vicious cycle of waking up just to survive each day is exhausting and demolishing to say the least. 

It's 3 days away from being a solid month since I walked out of my last A Level exam and since I walked out of college for the last time. I'm not the most resilient person but I was frustrated with myself for not bouncing back straight away. Days, even a couple of weeks after that last exam I was still crying myself to sleep because of the stupid mistakes I'd made. Things I'd said or done during those dark months haunted me during the middle of the day and I felt like even though I'd finished my A Levels that I'd never find little moments of happiness again. Sounds hella dramatic, I know. But instead of being patient with myself, I became angrier every single day that I was still not feeling 100% myself and I should have just trusted that things would slowly feel simply okay again. 


Everyone has their own untold stories. Everyone has moments in their life that suck all of the light and joy out of their world for a while and it feels like you'll never enjoy life in the same way again. As cliche as it sounds, just be patient with yourself and be hopeful that you'll overcome whatever you're going through. Whether it's because over the last few years I've experienced some pretty horrific times in terms of my mental health, I'm starting to truly appreciate the small moments in life that make it worth living.

I'm learning to trust that there will always be better days around the corner. Inevitably and unfortunately, some people have to wait longer for those days to arrive than others but they will come. Making time for the people you love and experiencing genuine happiness and laughter after feeling lost for the longest time is everything to me. The last few days have been overwhelming and I can't say that anything has really happened except that I've just taken a step back to breathe. A simple pause. Just to absorb everything that is happening in the moment so that I can acknowledge how I'm truly feeling and appreciate that while it lasts. 

I decided to start writing again today because I've had an incredible few days with my closest friends and I've realised that even if it takes me a little longer and even if my mental health makes it almost impossible at times, I'll always find happiness around the corner. Each bad day I have may feel like I've taken 5 steps back but it also fuels my determination to live a happier life. Tomorrow will always be a new start and I'm learning to hold out hope that it'll be a happier one too. Whether it's staying up late to catch up with someone you haven't spoken to in a while, singing along to your favourite albums in the car with your closest friends or simply having some down time to do something you enjoy, it's really the little moments that make me feel genuinely very lucky to be alive. 

I hope you've all had a wonderful start to the summer (granted it won't last long so make the most of it while you can). I'm sure I'll be back with a new post very soon. 

Lots of Love,
Meg X 


19 Things I Learned Before Turning 19

3.13.2018

As some of you may know, today marks 19 years around the sun for me and I wanted to make a post dedicated to some of the lessons and facts I have learned in those 19 years and the advice I would now give to my younger self. I thought it may be fun to create this little list and share it with you guys, especially since I absolutely love reading posts like this. I always find them so relatable and being the nostalgic person that I am I thought this would be the perfect post to upload on my 19th birthday.



1. Stop apologising to people for being who you are. You don't owe anybody an explanation.

2. Don't take the people who make an effort to be in your life for granted. They're special and you're extremely lucky to have them.

3. You can't go far wrong by being kind and doing the decent thing. People always appreciate kindness, no matter how small the gesture may be.

4. Failure isn't always a bad thing. If you're not making mistakes and getting things wrong then you're clearly not trying hard enough. Keep going until you make it. 

5. Don't say or do anything while you're angry because you'll only regret it. Calm down and if there is still something you want to say afterwards then do it appropriately and not to make things worse.

6. Scars heal. The wounds and battles you face will find a way of healing over time. Things will really hurt for a while but I promise that the pain will ease eventually. 

7. You aren't always right. Your stubbornness may get the better of you occasionally but it's okay to admit it when you are wrong. It doesn't make you any less of a human or vulnerable to admit when you get it wrong. Self honesty feels like freedom. 

8. Travelling brings out the best in you so keep doing it. See everything you want to see and don't let anything stop you. You've been lucky enough to see some amazing sights in your life so far but you really haven't seen anything yet. 

9. Independence really is one of the best feelings. Trust me, it sucks sometimes but the freedom that comes along with it will make you feel so much more in control of you life. Relying on other people won't get you anywhere.

10. Bad days are perfectly normal and you just have to embrace them. The storm will always pass eventually so be patient with yourself. You're doing the best you can and it will get easier for you soon.

11. Change is a good thing. Despite how terrifying and unsettling it can feel, in the long run change will do you the world of good. 

12. You can't control other people. There will always be people who have damaging opinions in the world and society and while they may be offensive and upsetting, it's just the way they are. Bad people have always and will always exist so just do your best to rise above them.

13. You are so much stronger than you think you are. Life can be cruel beyond words at times but never doubt that you can get through anything.

14. Don't feel like you have to be ashamed of what you're passionate about and what makes you happy. Everyone has their own guilty pleasures. 

15. You will never know everything. You'll continue to learn new things until you take your last breath and that's what makes life so exciting. 

16. You're never going to be like the girl on Instagram with the flawless looks and lifestyle that you crave. Comparing yourself to others isn't going to get you anywhere. Accepting and loving yourself is the key to happiness and despite the fact that you're not quite there yet, you'll wake up one day and realise that you're the only person you ever want to be. 

17. Your anxiety and panic attacks are very real. People will tell you that you're exaggerating or your mental health is not important but never listen to them. You're strong and incredible for dealing with it every single day.

18. Stop rushing. You've still got your whole life ahead of you so just take a second to breathe and take it all in. You're doing just fine and it's not a race. 

19. You're allowed to treat yourself every now and then. Being selfish can often be necessary so stop feeling guilty for looking after yourself. You'll thank yourself for it one day.

I hope you guys enjoyed this one. I really loved writing this one so I hope you guys have enjoyed it. I'll see you all soon with another blog post but for now I'm going to have some birthday cake and a cheeky glass of wine because ya girl is 19!




Lots of Love,
Meg X

3 Lifestyle Changes I've Made In The Last 18 Months That I Don't Regret

3.08.2018

If you read my blog post all about embracing change ~ see here ~ then you'll know that I'm learning to love change and make the most out of it as opposed to absolutely dreading it and having a complete and utter meltdown. Over the last year and a half or so, I've made quite a few big lifestyle changes that I'm really proud of despite the fact that I occasionally had to do a lot of thinking to convince myself that they were the right thing for me. So, I thought I'd talk through 3 of those changes I've made and why I certainly don't regret them.



Going Pescetarian

For those of you who might not have heard of a pescetarian before, it's basically a vegetarian except we still include fish and seafood in our diet. Now most people who decide to stop eating meat usually do it in steps by reducing how much meat they consume and eventually stop eating it all together. I think I made things difficult for myself because I just decided to cut out all meat there and then without ever having given it a thought prior to that moment. My decision was based on a complete mixture of things if I'm being completely honest from ethical reasons to just feeling that bit healthier. For the first 6 weeks, I went completely veggie and didn't include fish in my diet whatsoever but I kinda struggled with it a little and decided to eat fish until I'd found other appropriate substitutes, done more research and also I needed to let my body adjust to this important change. However overtime I grew to feel comfortable with the diet I was on and decided to find a happy medium and remain a pescetarian. My friends and family were all really supportive and encouraging which really helped, especially during the first few months because they were a little tough at times. The only thing I struggle with occasionally is finding new recipes to try so if anyone reading this has any suggestions then I'd be so grateful to hear them! I've had so many different reactions when people discover that I don't eat meat and the biggest question I get is "don't you miss it?" And in all honesty, no. I really don't. I think your body adapts and you eventually stop craving it so it really doesn't cross my mind. Now I'm not one of those people who tries to force this kind of lifestyle on anyone because everybody is completely different and some people have diet requirement which makes it difficult to adapt to a diet that doesn't include meat. But if you have ever given it a second thought before and you don't think you can do it - trust me when I say that you can. Take baby steps and do some research to begin with if that makes it easier but I certainly don't regret making this decision and I'm proud of myself for making this change when I did. 

Chopping My Hair Off

Roughly 24 hours after deciding to go pescetarian, I made another huge decision regarding my lifestyle. Now this one had been on my mind for roughly 12 months before I decided to just go for it. When I say cutting my hair, I'm talking about a quite drastic change to my hair as opposed to a trim. Ever since I was little, I've had ridiculously thick and curly hair. You only have to see photos of me to see exactly what I mean. My hair was fairly short when I was younger because I never really did anything with it. I mean, do people really style their hair when they're 5 years old? Probably not. I'll always remember my hairdresser telling me that the longer I grew my hair, the thinner and more manageable it would be - so that's exactly what I did. As I got older I eventually found my 'style' which looking back was questionable but cutting it all off never really crossed my mind until I was about 16 years old. I knew that having short hair would be so much easier to deal with despite the fact that it was shapeless when I was younger. My argument was that now that I'm older I'm obviously going to style it more and I just knew that there was no talking me out of it. I wanted it to have a bigger purpose and so I did a little research and discovered the Little Princess Trust which is where I ended up donating 16 inches of my hair. I had so much anxiety about this change because I knew it would be a long time before my hair was ever that long again but oh my goodness you guys. I felt and looked like a completely different person afterwards and I was just thrilled with the outcome. It was so much easier to take care of and it just gave me that confidence that I'd been missing. Hair grows back and you only live once so if you're thinking about doing something similar to what I did, all I can really say is go for it. 

Postponing University

Surprisingly, this was probably the most difficult decision to make out of the three. And that's because I've been in education my whole life knowing one day I'd be going to Uni. Whenever I thought about my 'plan' in terms of my education and career etc, I refused to see any obstacles that could prevent me from doing something or even delaying it. I'd finish high school, get through my A Levels and go to Uni and that was that. But after realising a little too late that I'd chosen the wrong subjects to study at A Level, it meant that I was faced with a decision that I really didn't want to have to make. I could either struggle through to the end of my two years at college and then go to University as planned or I could start again. Starting college again meant that I wouldn't be going to Uni the same year as my best friends and it essentially meant that I'd be alone finishing my studies which everyone else managed to get right the first time around. I really thought about it because it was possible for me to go to Uni with the grades I got in my original subjects but I knew deep down that it wouldn't be the right thing to do. I knew that I needed to drop the subjects that I despised with a passion and start over with subjects that I'm passionate about. And that was the best thing I could have ever done. I was dreading this third year in college. I thought I'd be judged for staying behind and I knew that seeing my friends in Uni would be a reminder that I'm not doing exactly that. But if I'm being honest, this has been the best year in terms of my education that I can remember. I love my subjects so much and I thoroughly enjoy going to my lectures and doing my assignments and I know that makes me seem like a nerd but it's truly been such an eye opener. I refuse to look at it as being me staying behind another year but rather me making a decision to study what I love in order to build the future that I want. Plus in the long run I'm only ever going to be grateful that I did myself a favour now as opposed to when I'm stuck in a job I hate. I've gone from getting E's and D's in my subjects to consistently getting A's and B's. Not only that but my mental health, my confidence and happiness in college has improved leaps and bounds which really is the most important thing. 

This post was a little longer than I anticipated it might be but I hope you enjoyed it and took something from it. Never fear making decisions or changes to your lifestyle because you may look back one day and see that it was the best thing you ever did.

Lots of Love,
Meg X

5 TV Shows I've Watched & LOVED In February

3.06.2018

I'm usually that person who watches something, falls in love and obsesses with it and then watches it on repeat instead of starting something new. However, this past month I've watched quite a few shows that I've never seen before and how I managed to avoid the hype when they were first released I have no idea because they are all incredible. Seriously, Netflix has been my best friend throughout February and I wanted to update you guys on what I've been watching recently in case you're looking for something new to binge watch on these snowy days we've been having recently. So in no particular order, lets goooooo!




1. The Good Place (2016, 2 seasons, Netflix)

I saw SO many people talking about this on Netflix at the beginning of February despite the fact that it's been out for over a year. You guys, this show is something special. It's about a woman called Eleanor who dies and ends up in an afterlife paradise for the ethical people a.k.a the good place but soon realises that she has been mistaken for somebody else. Each character offers something new and different to the dynamic and I found myself laughing and ugly crying throughout this series. The unexpected friendships in the series melt my heart and don't even get me started on the character development! It's such a chilled, feel good show and perfect for those evenings when you really haven't got the energy to do anything. 

2. One Day At A Time (2017, 2 seasons, Netflix)

If you're looking for a comedy drama /sitcom that has brilliant representation and tackles really important issues that are constantly being featured in the media then look no further. This is a Netflix original that follows the life of a Cuban-American family as they navigate through the ups and downs of life. Similarly to The Good Place, this one is such a feel good show and the episodes are half an hour max so you get through them so quickly which is the worst thing about it. Some of the story lines focus on immigration and Elena's coming out story and process to her family which I think is so important and especially since it's done in a sensitive and respectful manner. The writers, cast and crew have created nothing short of a masterpiece with this one and it's so under appreciated. If you watch one of the shows I mention today, please make it this one. 

3. Marcella (2016, Series 2 currently ongoing on ITV) 

My best friend has been asking me to watch this one ever since series 1 was released back in 2016 and it took stubborn old me long enough to join in on the hype. If you're anything like me then you can't get enough of a good ol' crime drama series and this one is truly so gripping. The second series started a couple of weeks ago and I hated being the only one who wasn't raving about how good it is so I binge watched series 1 within a couple of days and I can't get enough of it. Set in gorgeous London, Marcella is a female detective who returns to the job after taking 12 years family leave. She is drawn back by a case that sounds all too familiar to her as a serial killer she tried to catch before going on leave returns to the scene. It's so compelling and brilliantly acted and written. You really can't go wrong with this one if you're into this kinda thing.

4. Cuffs (2015, 1 Series) 

This next one may be me cheating my way out of it a little since I actually watched this when it first aired in 2015. I hadn't re watched it for quite a while and I was seriously in the mood for it so I spent no more than three days watching this series for the hundredth time earlier this month. Cuffs, oh Cuffs. How I utterly adore this series. Now, it isn't your typical detective series but that's one of the reasons why I love it so much. It's actually a drama that follows the lives of front line police officers within Brighton and the surrounding area of Sussex. It tackles really important issues and is equally character driven which is probably why I feel so attached to it. The location settings are truly stunning and there is something about each character that you secretly fall in love with. It has amazing representation, the story lines are incredible although they can be difficult to watch occasionally due to the painfully realistic nature of them, and it's just so well written. You'll kick yourself for not watching this one sooner. 

5. Mum (2016, Series 2 currently ongoing, BBC 2) 

And last but by no means least is Mum, another seriously under appreciated show that my best friend introduced me to a couple of weeks ago. This one certainly won't be everybody's cup of tea but if you're after a super chilled, relatable family orientated comedy then this is for you. It follows the life of 59 year old Cathy who is recently widowed and her family throughout the first year after her husband's death. It sounds pretty morbid and dull but you've gotta trust me when I say it's such a feel good, easy to watch show. Each episode is set in Cathy's house which gives it such a cosy and homely vibe which I love and it explores the dynamics between the family which is just something that most people can empathise with. I always find myself laughing out loud while watching this and it's the perfect show to unwind to after a long day that's for sure.

And there we have it! Apologies for how long this one was but I have seriously enjoyed watching these new shows this month and I wish someone had told me about them sooner so I thought I'd share them in case you're after something to binge watch. Thank you for reading, I'll see you all again soon.

Lots of Love,
Meg X

Why I Always Dread Telling People What I'm Going To Study At University

3.01.2018

Now bare with me because you're probably thinking going by the title that I've chosen to study something really unusual or something that nobody has ever heard of before but that's definitely not the case. In fact, I've actually applied (and accepted my offer) to study....

English Language and Linguistics.

Yep, that's it. And you're probably thinking 'why the heck do you dread telling people that?' and let me tell you that there are many reasons why. Ever since I knew what I wanted to study at University, and trust me I never saw this day coming because I'm the most indecisive person you'll ever meet, I've always had strange reactions whether they've been from family members or a stranger in a supermarket. And there are so many reasons why that's the case hence why I always dread the inevitable question when you're at this age and that is 'what are you going to study in Uni?'



I think the first thing that people tend to assume is 'You're already fluent in English, why the hell would you want to spend £9,000 + a year to study something you already know?' and okay fair enough, but there is so, so, SO much more to the subject than meets the eye. I've always been passionate about English. My decision to study this subject is based on my desire to understand the diversity and sheer complexity of the language that separates us from other species. I’m engrossed by the power, reach and influence of the language that we use daily yet is often taken for granted. Even at GCSE Level I got A's and never thought much of it at the time but after taking the subject at A Level I've grown to become fascinated by it. From language change to child acquisition to gender and language and the social and historical influences that are still in existence today, I get so engrossed in the subject. And despite my social anxiety, it's one of the very few subjects that I genuinely feel confident in and I thoroughly enjoy my lectures.

I've always said, and trust me when I say that I know this through experience, that you should choose to study what you're passionate about, especially if you're paying a lot of money to do so and in many cases you're moving far away from home. English Language for me is a passion and being somebody who thoroughly enjoys writing and being analytical it made perfect sense when I had to decide what I wanted to study. Not only that but my voluntary work has influenced by aspiration to become a speech and language therapist which ties in perfectly since I'm already so enthusiastic about the subject. 

I completely understand why wanting to study this subject may spark questions and that's perfectly okay because it's my passion and my decision and that's something that has taken me a long time to accept. I've always been heavily influenced by other people's opinions and there have been endless occasions when I've made the wrong decision for myself because I assumed that it's what everybody else wanted for me. But here I am approaching the age of 19 and I can finally say that I'm going to do things my way from now on, especially if the decisions I'm making may eventually come back to haunt me. So, if there is one thing I want you to take from this post it's this - Do what makes you happy and learn to make decisions for yourself without having to explain yourself. You don't owe anybody an explanation because this is your life and your chance to make the most of it. 

Thank you for reading this one guys, I'll be back again soon with a new post very soon.

Lots of Love, 
Meg X



Why I Have A Love Hate Relationship With Nostalgia

2.26.2018

This topic that I'm really eager to talk about on my blog today has been at the very top of my 'blog ideas' page in my notebook for a heckin' long time and that's because I'm a little nervous to approach it. Plus, it's been a little while since I wrote something that was a little more personal and closer to home and so I thought I would start writing and just see what happens. 


I wanted to talk to you about nostalgia. It's something that everyone is likely to experience at some stage and it's defined by being a wish or desire to return in thought to a former time in your life. It is sentimentality for the past and is typically a period or place that has happy personal associations. It is such a bittersweet feeling where you're longing for the past and things that have already happened in the hope that you'll feel more at ease with whatever is happening around you in the moment you're currently living in. While most people feel nostalgia when they watch a movie they used to watch a lot when they were younger or it's triggered by a familiar scent you wore on your favourite holiday, my relationship with nostalgia has become quite overwhelming over the last couple of years.

Truthfully, I've developed a love hate relationship with it. To refer to myself as being a sentimental person would be the biggest understatement of the year. Mixed with being overly dramatic, getting far too attached to places and people and having an undesirable fear of uncertainty, I find myself feeling overwhelmed with nostalgia all - the - time. And let me tell you that it's exhausting.  I've always viewed it to be a defense mechanism where I'll constantly think about the past in order to escape the present moment. Having an A Level in Psychology certainly doesn't mean that I'm an expert when it comes to this kinda thing, believe me, but it's something that has been on my mind a lot over the last few months.

I love the comfort that comes with nostalgia and I think that's one of the reasons why I feel like I'm constantly living in the past. It's oddly reassuring to think about something that has already happened, whether it be good or bad, purely because no matter how hard you try it cannot be changed. Whereas the future is completely uncertain and no matter how much planning we do, it's extremely rare that everything will pan out exactly how you expect it to. And while I'm all for being spontaneous and looking forward to what the future may bring, I find it almost impossible not to cling onto the good moments that I've already lived through.

While the sensation of reliving moments from my past can bring me the greatest sense of comfort and familiarity, there is one reason in particular why I hate how time consuming the feeling of nostalgia can be. And that's simply because I worry that I'm being so caught up in what has already happened that I'm getting too distracted to create new moments in my life. The idea that I'm wasting all of my time reliving my past is terrifying to me and yet I'm constantly finding myself doing just that. Nostalgia is a wonderful thing but when it affects what's happening in my life right now then it starts to become a problem. 

I don't fully understand what can cause nostalgia to occur so frequently but it's something that I am striving to gain a clearer understanding of and keep it under control this year. I really want to start living in the moment and appreciate things as they're happening and not 6 months down the line. This post is definitely on the personal side but it's like I've said before - this blog is my space to write about anything and everything that comes to mind. And who knows, maybe I'll reassure someone out there that they're not alone if they're also experiencing this kind of thing. 

I hope you're all having a wonderful day and I'll see you all again very soon.

Lots of Love,
Meg X

10 Of My Ultimate Favourite Films

2.21.2018


Today's post has been a longggg time coming but it's finally here, woooo! Now, don't be fooled by the photo because those aren't actually my favourite films, you'll just have to keep reading to see what they are. But if you're anything like me then you're always looking for a new film to watch and I just so happen to be a huge film lover. I get so engrossed in films and I'm one of those who is always rambling on about the editing, cinematography and soundtracks. I appreciate everything from the way it's filmed to the scripts and of course the acting. And despite this post being harder to write than I anticipated, I do have my top 10 ultimate favourite films for you guys today. So, grab yo self a cuppa because this will be a long'un! Note: They're not in order, that would have been way too difficult!



Girl, Interrupted (1999)

One of my best friends introduced me to this film a few years ago now and I instantly knew I'd love it because we have such similar tastes when it comes to films. Starring Winona Ryder and Angelina Jolie and Directed by James Mangold, the film is based on the true story of Susanna Kaysen who is a young woman who finds herself in a women's mental institution set in the late 1960's. I was fascinated by this film from the moment it started. It just has this "vibe" about it that I love. It's definitely difficult to watch at times so I'd recommend researching more on the trigger warnings before watching but it gives you a little insight on what it was like back in the 60's and how mental health was viewed by those who have perhaps never experienced it. I completely and utterly adore the soundtrack in this film and generally it's one of the most under appreciated films ever made.

The Intern (2015)

I only watched this film for the first time last year and it really pulled on my heartstrings. It's not a romance but I found it so unbelievably moving and it's inevitable that I'm going to love anything that Anne Hathaway and Robert De Niro are in. This film is about a hugely successful business woman who owns an online fashion website. The company hire senior interns and due to hating the boredom that comes along with retirement, 70 year old widower Ben decides he's got nothing to lose and goes for the job. I think the reason why I love this film so much is because it truly highlights the differences between our generation and the one before us. Anne and Robert's characters form such a beautiful yet completely unexpected friendship and that's what I find so heartwarming about it. It's such a cosy, funny and feel good kinda film that everyone has just got to watch at some point. 

The Sound of Music (1965) 

I'm convinced that I've been watching this film since I started walking and talking. This one never gets old and it's one that my whole family enjoy watching together. There is something just so comforting and familiar about this film and even growing up I found myself in awe of the soundtrack, costumes and characters. Despite the fact that I probably didn't fully understand the whole plot growing up, I've always felt so sentimental about this film and even at the age of 18 I'll often find myself singing along to the well known and loved songs that bring back so many memories for me. 

Hidden Figures (2016) 

I felt every single emotion under the sun during the time that I watched this film. The story is about a team of female African-American mathematicians who served a crucial role in NASA during the early years of the U.S Space Program. They serve as the brains behind one of the greatest and significant operations in history - the launch of the astronaut John Glenn. It's set in the 60's and is full of kick ass moments which at the time that it was set were simply extraordinary. I felt as though I learned so so so much and I felt so happy that the females behind the success of something so significant were getting the chance to tell the story from their perspective as opposed to through the eyes of the men. It's such an eye opening film and these extraordinary women made their mark in history. I just think we can all be inspired by this film. I have so much love. 

The Theory of Everything (2014) 

This film is one of the most moving films I have ever seen in my life. I found endless inspiration in this film and I felt as though I learned so, so much. The Theory of Everything starts in the 1960's and follows the story of the brilliant genius that is Stephen Hawking who is played by the utterly talented and charming Eddie Redmayne. The film captures Steven discovering that he has a motor neuron disease at the age of 21 and from then he begins an ambitious study of time, of which he himself has very little left according to his doctor. Stephen is one of the most celebrated physicists of our time and it's one of those films that truly will have you smiling and crying from start to end. 

La La Land (2017)

It doesn't matter what kind of mood I'm in, the second I hear a song from the soundtrack I instantly feel so much better. I utterly adore this film like most people and I definitely wasn't put off by the ending, in fact, it's one of the reasons why I love it so much. Films that can pull off an unpredictable ending that actually make sense are always a winner in my eyes (hence why I'm not the biggest fan of the typical romance films). I found myself identifying with Mia from the very beginning and I think that's why her character is so likable throughout the film. The cinematography is an absolute dream and the soundtrack is, well, absolutely perfect. My top favourites have got to be someone in the crowd, audition (the fools who dream) and city of stars but it's a close call that's for sure. I'll admit when I first saw the trailer for this one I was so hesitant about whether I'd like it but I was completely blown away and I've already lost count over how many times I've seen it. 

Eddie The Eagle (2016)

I didn't really know anything about this film only that my Grandad had nobody to go and see it with him at the time it came out so I decided to go with him. I mean, how bad could this film be? Well, well, well. The emotions in this film hit me like a tonne of bricks, my goodness. Taron Egerton and Hugh Jackman are phenomenal actors and their chemistry was faultless. This film tells the roller coaster story of Eddie Edwards, a British skier who competed in the Winter Olympics and truthfully I didn't know much about him before seeing this but I was just blown away by his determination and inability to give up his dream. It's a truly moving film and I've discovered that I simply can't watch this film without crying my eyes out. The cinematography and soundtrack is stunning and I absolutely adore the 80's vibe and how realistic it is. Definitely one of the most under appreciated films out there.

The Greatest Showman (2017)

After seeing this film three times in the cinema since it came out just two months ago, how could it not make my top ten list. I'm just mesmerized by everything that this film offers. It stars Hugh Jackman, Zac Efron and Zendaya to name just a few of the phenomenal actors and it's inspired by the wonderful imagination of P.T Barnum. It's an original musical which celebrates the birth of show business and presenting everyone as equals despite differences that society have deemed as inappropriate. It truly is a celebration of humanity and the message behind the film is something which I strongly love and admire. The soundtrack is exceptional, wow. It really is a work of art and it's rare that I discover a soundtrack where I genuinely love every single song. 

Harry Potter (2001-2011)

I'm constantly changing my mind about which film out of the series is my favourite and so it's only fair to include the film series as a whole, I hope that's not me cheating my way out of it too much. There isn't much to say here because the majority of people have watched and fallen in love with Harry Potter just like I did when I was much younger. I read the books and it was always inevitable that the films would never be as good, but having said that, the Harry Potter films are a work of art. I always feel beyond overwhelmed watching the films. The sense of nostalgia is something I find so much joy and comfort in and I'll never tire of talking about the endless reasons why I'll forever be grateful that they exist. 

The Imitation Game (2011)

Now this one is my ultimate favourite film of all time and has been ever since it was released which will come as absolutely no surprise to those of you who know me or follow my social media. I saw this film in the cinema when it came out in 2014 and instantly fell in love with it. In fact, I can remember getting goosebumps when I saw the trailer and I just knew that this film was going to be something very special. Benedict Cumberbatch, Keira Knightly, Matthew Goode, Allen Leech, Mark Strong, Charles Dance, Alex Lawther. I mean, the cast says it all. I adore each of the actors so much individually that when I saw that they were all going to be in this film I just knew that I had to see it. The plot focuses on the true story of the legendary crypt analyst Alan Turing and the British intelligence agency on their journey to breaking Enigma in Bletchly Park during the second world war. I have watched this film endless times and there hasn't been a single time where I haven't cried or experienced goosebumps and I'm shocked at how little I knew about this story until I saw the film. The acting, script, cinematography, editing and soundtrack cannot be praised enough. I am utterly and completely in love with everything about this film and I can't see a day where it won't be my favourite film of all time. 

And breatheeee. There we have it. My ultimate top ten favourite films of all time. You can probably see that I'm a sucker for films based on true stories. How could you not be though?? They make me cry uncontrollably every single time! The bottom half of the list definitely varies depending on what kinda mood I'm in but nothing has seemed to budge The Imitation Game from my top spot as of yet. 

Anyway, I'll love you and leave you. Remember to keep your eyes peeled for a new post coming soon where I'll be talking about the importance of self care.

Lots of Love,
Meg X

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