Dear Future Me On A Level Results Day 2018


Bonjour! Yet again, it has been a little while. I apologise for not updating my little corner of the internet for quite some time so I'm hoping I'll be forgiven. Truthfully, I haven't been in the writing mood and I've felt a little lost for ideas and things to talk about. I've chosen to blame it on the glorious Summer we've had because anyone who knows me will know that I practically hibernate during the warmer months. Autumn and Winter are the seasons when I feel the most like myself and so I just haven't been in the blogging mood. However, I'm back and hopefully this time I won't be abandoning you any time soon.

As you can see from the title, this post will be a little different from anything I've written before. I've seen a couple of videos on YouTube (because yes I am currently freaking out big time about results day and have been binge watching past results day videos) from people who have a positive outlook on the day. I thought I could try being a little optimistic and reassuring by writing a few things down that I and other students need to remember on results day. So, here we go.

Dear future me on results day 2018, 

It's difficult to know where to begin because the last few months have been such a roller coaster. Challenging, strenuous, draining, frustrating, rewarding. The 3 years that you have been doing A Levels have been the most important years in your life so far. Not only because they have created stepping stones for your future but because they have been the years that you have naturally grown as a person. You've become more confident in the person you are, you've taken risks, been incredibly brave and you've come out the other end stronger than I ever could have hoped for you. Regardless of how horrific your mental health was at times, you always pushed through. You were patient with yourself when everything became difficult and frustrating. You were resilient, focused and I know that you could not have worked any harder than you did. 

The last 3 years have literally flown by and yet so much has happened during that time. It seems ridiculous and diminishing that 3 years of work comes down to a single piece of paper with a few letters on it this Thursday. I can't count the number of sleepless nights you've had during that time, how many times you doubted yourself or cried for hours the night before an important deadline. But guess what? You did it. Results day for you isn't about whether you got the grades to get into University because thankfully you were accepted into your first choice back in January which I'm still so proud of you for. I know that doesn't make it any easier because results day for you has always been about all of your hard work paying off. And I get it. It's so unbelievably disheartening to have overworked yourself for months for your efforts to not be reflected in the outcome. And I think that's why today means so much to you. It's why you've had so many sleepless nights and nightmares about it throughout the summer. And that's okay. It's okay because it shows how much you care. Deep down I know you're a huge believer that grades don't define you and they shouldn't restrict you from achieving your goals. Having said that, I think it's important to remind you that you also believe that everything happens for a reason. Yes you worked so fucking hard. Yes it's unfair that your grades are ultimately determined by a two hour paper at the end of the course that don't always reflect what you're actually capable of achieving because of pressure and time restrictions etc. But these are the grades that you are going to get. And if it means that plans change and you're forced to consider Plan B, then maybe Plan A wasn't the right path for you anyway. You'll eventually end up exactly where you're meant to be. Taking a different route or changing your mind doesn't mean you've failed. You of all people should have accepted that by now. 

If you don't get the results you're hoping for, please know that you did everything you could. I know exam season feels like a blur right now but you couldn't have worked any harder. Your grades don't reflect what kind of person you are. You're still resilient, empathetic, focused, kind and determined. You're still going to the University of Brighton to study English Language and Linguistics. You can still look at doing a Masters in Speech and Language Pathology. You're still going to live in Brighton for the next 3 years. You're still going to meet some incredible new people. You're still going to be surrounded by your friends and family. And yes you'll still make a million mistakes and wrong decisions along the way but honey you'll still flourish. You'll still grow and you'll look back one day and accept that everything happens for a reason even if you're not entirely sure what that reason is at the specific time that it happens. Just be patient. Trust that life is taking you on the path you're meant to be on and live your best life because grades are not going to influence what truly matters. If you don't get what you're hoping for, be sad. You're allowed to cry and be disappointed. But then look at the bigger picture and remember exactly what your past self has just told you. Your life is worth so much more than what is written on a piece of paper so if you take anything from this post then let it be that. 

Best of luck to everyone receiving results this summer. Whether you're in year 13 waiting for your A Level results or you're expecting your GCSE results next week - I'm rooting for you and I know that you should be proud of yourself no matter what. 

Lots of Love,
Meg X

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